We’ve all been here! How many times have you heard people say, “I don’t know what to do….What if it’s the wrong decision?…I could be making a huge mistake…I don’t know what’s in stall for me….etc.”
I know for a fact that I have been in this conundrum too many times. Thank God, with the right support around me, most of the choices I’ve made worked out really well. But this isn’t such an easy road to ride on if you don’t have the support and tools to process the pro’s and con’s. As a life transformation coach and a clinical hypnotherapist, I have come across numerous people that find it hard to make decisions in life.
Have you ever asked a visitor, a friend or family member, this simple question, “What would you like to drink?” Did they answer…’anything’ or ‘I don’t know, you can decide.’? Why do you have to make the choices of what they would prefer? Many people in the world find it a challenge to make decisions. From making decisions about mundane things like choosing a drink, clothes or a route to work, to the more complex and important ones such as choosing a career path or a life- partner, some people can buckle under the pressure. The emotions people experience as the brain begins to process new prospects in life, starts with FEAR. Fear of not knowing the outcome, leads to doubt, and snowballs into a decrease in confidence and faith in oneself.
Fear increases the stress hormone cortisol in the brain causing anxiety and unhappiness. This may last in the body for a short while however it adds to the emotional baggage. People, who are often indecisive begins to form patterns in the way they think and behave. There is a lack of unity in their thoughts, words and behaviour.
Here are some key tips which I have used when making important decisions:
- Get to know yourself– Know what makes you happy. Start to ask yourself questions such as- Who am I? What puts a smile on my face? What do I value in life? Where do I see myself a year from now? Become emotionally literate ie. Get to know what makes you tick.
- Believe in yourself– Have faith in what you know. Be proud of your achievements and abilities. Have confidence in what would be best for you.
- Look at the possibilities of the different routes to your goal– Visualise or see yourself achieving the outcome. Take cognisance of how you are feeling whilst visualising yourself in that specific setting. Question yourself on which route would be the best one for you.
- Does your decision affect anyone else? – If it affects you or other people in a positive way then it’s a ‘no brainer’- you are on the right track. If your choice is going to have negative repercussions on others, would your conscience be able to deal with it?
- Golden Rule: Don’t make any decisions when you are emotionally charged up with negativity. – It could be disastrous filtering through all that negative current. Meditate- Release those emotions and then revisit what needs to be done.
It’s ok to make odd mistakes or two however be wise and learn from these lessons. Don’t make the wrong choices again and again- it then becomes harmful baggage that will start to weigh you down.
I hope that this has helped you to get rid of your fear of the unknown. If you don’t take calculated risks, you could miss opportunities in life that would lead to your happiness.
Keep smiling- U Make Ur happiness.